K- Two More Songs

Sometimes I have no words and just songs, like today. I have been listening to these two nonstop, and they're definitely worth the time.

 

You've got a hold on me Jesus! :-)

and

Without Your presence I'm not living!

Ahhhh......

Fresh Song

Lovin this song today.....

Be refreshed in the joy of the Lord!

Strike the strings on my heart

And I’ll sing your melodies

A hymn of love, songs of blood

Spilling from my mouth

And all of my praises, whoa oh oh oh oh

Belong to you

Pluck my heart like a harp

And sing salvations song

Your praises fill the air I breathe

With the sweetest melodies

And all of my praises belong to you

 

The Conflict of Joy

There's a lot of things swirling in my brain right now, but I've had one "issue" particular coming to mind.
"Weep with those who weep, rejoice with those who rejoice..." (Somewhere in the NT)
So many times I have been the victim, the self-pitying one that is envious of other people's joys. Many times. I am generally pretty good at rejoicing with them, even if I have to stare into my own pit afterwards. I love rejoicing when me and a friend are both in a "great" stage in life (I say "great" because I'm learning even the worst days God makes great..) The one I have been struggeling with lately is when everyone around me seems to be in a pit and I seem like the only one in the world to possess joy. {This is not meant to sound arrogant at all...like I said i've had my fair share of pits!} I tend to feel guilty when I share the awesome things Jesus is doing and saying in my life, and also if my prayer requests are more light hearted. I don't want to put my sister in Christ in a potential place of being envious or frustrated, etc. How do I both empathize and pour into a sister that is "in the pit" AND be honest about where I'm at without tension?
When it gets really bad, I start to question if I really do have joy and if it's ok. HA. Yes, that's where the enemy must come in. I am CALLED to have inexpressible joy....a deep joy that does not wither with circumstance.
"Though you have not seen him, you love him; and even though you do not see him now, you believe in him and are filled with an inexpressible and glorious joy." -1 Pet. 1:8
The Lord is slowly teaching me things but I would also love any wisdom. I'm sensing humility is a key word and having the willingness to bear one another's burdens, while letting God's joy within me overflow and uplift that person.

Well, back to studying.......
Blessings!

Someone must have been praying for me

today because I was PRODUCTIVE and MANAGED MY TIME and did not fell bound to things that waste time! It's such a good feeling, maybe this will stick around for a while! :-)
21 credits, day 7 and I'm still alive!
The Lord is good.

CUTE!

Saw this the other day....doesn't it remind you of the childlike faith we are to have?!?!

:-)

I survived San Fran and I am more than happy to be back and to undertake this crazy term! The Lord showed me a lot over break and though it is not all easy stuff I am going through right now, I am learning to not dwell on the problems, the crap, the sin, the stress, the worries....and focus on HIM and who He is and what HE can do. It makes a world of a difference.

I thought it would be an appropriate time to bring up my life verse:

Psalm 73:21-26 NLT
"Then I realized that my heart was bitter, and I was all torn up inside.
I was so foolish and ignorant-I must have seemed like a senseless animal to you.
YET I STILL BELONG TO YOU. You hold my right hand.
You guide me with your counsel, leading me to a GLORIOUS DESTINY.
Whom have I in heaven but you? I desire you more than anything on earth.
My health may fail, and my spirit may grow weak,
but God remains the strength of my heart; HE IS MINE FOREVER."

He is ours forever!!

Snippets

So much that I could say...here are some snippets in the life of Susannah!

||| Missing my future husband
||| Struggeling with trusting God about said man
||| Heard a little song snippet in my head in the shower today that went something like

I miss You too much when I go a day without coming to You~'cuz a day is too long when Your air fills my lungs and You made me, and You're madly in love with me

||| Sat down the other day with the Word and Jesus told me to read Jonah. It shocked me how many similarities there were between us--I feel like sometimes I want to run away from my Ninevah (Corvallis) and the Lord has recently been challenging the heart I have for students here. Am I passionate to see His mercy and grace and love save these people, or do I just want to see them "get what they deserve" for all the sin I see that entangles them! WOW. Ok, Lord.
||| Starting to plan some good ideas for next year--although the reality hasn't fully set in yet (thank you Jesus for protecting me from going insane already)
||| Missing Costa Rica A LOT....am so itching to leave the country again. Also, missing Mexico A LOT as I was there this time last year. 
||| Getting more and more excited to hopefully stay in Corvallis this summer....to take a few classes, work, live under one roof, fellowship with wonderful friends, bike ride every day, soak in the sun, etc...
||| Also getting excited for my crazy term next year, as crazy as that sounds. I'm mainly excited for my volunteer hours, which 4.5 hrs of the week will be spent at the nearby HS tutoring ESL students. Also, the class is great, which is about 17 of us, and Jordan my friend will also be in it, as well as two other awesome Christian girls. I'm praying the Lord will use us in great ways to share God's love. Also, roughly half the class is Hispanic so I always love that. :-)
||| Learning that sometimes I think catching up on people's awesome journeys with Jesus=having my own adventure with Jesus. I'm learning that can "feel legit" but when I look at the foundation it is weak. We're working on that one.
||| On a more random note, I am leaving for San Fran in about 3 hours; I should be sleeping but my stubborn self wanted to stay up until we left :-) Going with Dad, Bev and Miles. Should be fun but please pray.

Well, I might as well get an hour or two of sleep...;-)
Love you all and may you experience more of the Lord's grace today....
Suse

Surprise...

(me and Julie, 2 years ago)

it is indeed confirmed that we are set out to journey together managing Charis next year!

It is going to be a good year.

A little nervous? Check. A lot excited? Check. A little fearful? Check. Fully trusting in God? Check. 

Check, check, check.

So much more to say, but I am blown away by how the Lord has worked in our lives even just this year in preparing us and I know that He his faithful to complete His work through us, as scary as it is.

Getting some good ideas churned up! :-) Thank you for your prayers. Love,

me